“Mean People” - by Hans Christian King Spiritual Radio Show Transcription GUIDANCE FOR YOUR LIFE Radio Show

“Mean People” - by Hans Christian King 

Spiritual Radio Show Transcription

GUIDANCE FOR YOUR LIFE Radio Show

with Hans Christian King www.HansKing.com

and Alfred Ricci www.AlfredRicci.com

Topic: Mean People

November 22, 2014

Alfred:

Hello everyone and welcome to GUIDANCE FOR YOUR LIFE - Wisdom for Your Soul. This is Alfred the Padawan Learner to the Modern Day Mystic himself Hans Christian King. We've got a doozy of a topic for you today: Mean People - and how to deal with mean people from a spiritual perspective. But first I'm handing you over to Jennifer who takes care of Facebook and our Random Acts of Kindness. If you don't know what that is, Jennifer please tell them about our Random Acts of Kindness and what's going on with us for the next couple of weeks.

Jennifer:

Thanks Alfred. Our Random Acts of Kindness Event, as many of you already know, is an ongoing series of gift-giving that we've been doing on Hans' Facebook page. We love it when folks spread Hans' message by sharing his posts and events so we jump in every now and then and randomly choose people who have shared the most and we give them gifts to show our appreciation. We're giving away goodies that range from a couple of audio lessons to full classes and videos. We've given away a lot of good stuff and we have a lot more to give! Thank you all so much for all you do. Keep sharing and if you haven't already done so, please come and join us on Facebook. Hans' page can be found under Hans Christian King1. That's the number 1. We do have some exciting events coming up in December, so keep an eye out on Facebook and on our Events page on HansKing.com. We'll be posting more information as the events get closer. And that's all for now Alfred. Thanks everyone.

Alfred:

Thanks for that Jennifer. We really appreciate you taking care of Facebook because that is the way that we reach out to you is through social media. As you may have heard we do no traditional marketing. Everything we do we rely on word-of-mouth. If you're happy with our Products, if you're happy with a Reading with Hans, if you've had a class with me, we'd really appreciate it if you tell others or just simply go onto Facebook and share what we're doing. Share one of our Daily Quotes, share with your friends, we really appreciate the help of getting the word out there. So for today's topic: Mean People... Before I hand it over, I'm going to give you something to ponder. Could you image that people are mean only because of your perception? So without further ado, I present to you the Modern Day Mystic himself Hans Christian King.

Hans:

Hello everybody, welcome to the show, glad to be back with you. Interesting topic: Mean People. This was actually sent in by one of our Circle Members and we're so happy to respond to that. Please remember that we do encourage you to participate with the show and send in questions that you have on basically any subject that you feel you would like to be enlightened with. Alfred, how do they do that?

Alfred:

Sorry, I forgot to announce that Hans. Yes, thank you Yasmin in Vienne. Vienne is Vienna, Austria. Thank you Yasmin for the topic. And if you have a topic that you'd like us to talk about, you can either go to Contact Us on HansKing.com or I think there's also a place on the Radio Show page to send in your topic. And if we happen to choose your topic, we'll let you know. And of course if there's something personal to deal with that topic, we'll try to address it also. So thank you all for sending in your topics. We really appreciate it. It makes the show a little bit more interesting. So Hans...

Hans:

Yes sir?

Alfred:

Is it that people are "mean" because of people's perceptions?

Hans:

Well, yes. You're on the right track there but let's remember something. Let's remember what the teaching says. The teaching says: Who someone is and their behavior are two different things. So we may see Alfred, someone do something  we perceive as mean, but that does not necessarily mean that the individual themselves are mean. They may not even realize that what they're doing is mean. They sure wouldn't like to have it done to them. So what do we do Alfred, when somebody does something mean to us?

Well our normal response is to, I'm sorry, but overreact. Because they're not actually doing it to you, they're doing it to a circumstance that they're living in. They're doing it from a place within themselves that is defending themselves by attacking. But are they really trying to hurt you or are they just simply not aware of their behavior? That's a tough subject, Alfred. And I know that you sometimes disagree with me on this. Tell me what disagreement you might have here.

Alfred:

It's really looking at "why" the person is doing that in the first place.

Hans:

That's right.

Alfred:

Is the person reacting to their opinion, their judgment of their world?

Hans:

Yes. From their personal pain.

Alfred:

What they've been through. And trying to completely understanding someone's life, someone's karma, someone's experiences, as we've told you before, is impossible. Because think about it. You're with yourself 24 hours a day. How much of your life do you completely understand? Okay? And if you're having a hard time understanding your karma, your dharma, your lessons, trying to do your inner-work, trying to clear out your gunk in order to become more peaceful, how can you have a judgment of what somebody else is going through and what somebody else does?

Hans:

Oftentimes Alfred I'll see someone say something or actually do something that appears to be mean and inside of me I will say: Bless them, I hope they understand what effect this is having. Because most people who do mean things really aren't aware of the effect it has on other people. 

Alfred:

So here's a good question Hans. So would there be any mean people if you didn't have a judgment of their actions?

Hans:

No. Because the person...you're actually having a judgment of the person, not a judgment of the action. So no. We wouldn't perceive people as being mean if we had no judgment. It's our judgment, as you know, that gets in our way - always.

Alfred:

But regardless of our opinion, some actions do produce negative karma. If someone does something that produces negative karma, are we as individuals supposed to do anything, spiritually speaking?

Hans:

Well use it as a lesson if you choose. Here's your opportunity to say: I choose not to have a judgment of that person and what they're saying or doing has no effect on me. It's not a statement of who I am. It is a statement, in fact, of where they're at. And as long as you use it that way, then you can take negativity and turn it into a positive for yourself.

Alfred:

Yes, I always like to reflect upon one of the greatest leaders and teachers of the world that said: Be the change you wish to see in the world. If you see something...

Hans:

I think that was Gandhi.

Alfred:

Yes. Actually it was The Mahatma who said: Instead of reacting out on what you see or you perceive to be wrong or mean, go within and first deal with it yourself. Okay? So that's one of the lessons that you can take is when you have a judgment of something that you perceive to be mean or wrong...

Hans:

You need to look at yourself at this point Alfred.

Alfred:

...is to look at yourself.

Hans:

Yes, exactly.

Alfred:

And that's what we're trying to tell you here. Right, Hans?

Hans:

Absolutely. It's how we perceive ourself. When somebody says something, or does something that appears to be towards us or a criticism of us or something that we have done, remember always - none of your business. Seriously children, none of your business. What they are saying, what they are doing has utterly nothing to do with you. But how you handle it has everything to do with your spiritual growth. If you become the wilted lily because of somebody's attack on you, then they have won. Not only have they won, but they've allowed you to hurt yourself and degrade yourself to be hurt by that action. If you turn to that person and say: Sorry, that's not my problem. They will get so mad, they will get so angry, but it's the truth. That's the key. It's the truth.

Alfred:

Oh, that's a great response. When somebody's mean to you, to look at them and say: Thank you for helping me practice patience.

Hans:

Yes. Exactly.

(Alfred and Hans Laughing)

Hans:

So mean people ofttimes without meaning to have the absolute opposite effect of  what they're trying to accomplish. They make you stronger. There's a saying somewhere, I don't know where it is - what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. We learn from adversity. We don't grow in the light children. We grow towards the light, to the light. So we learn our really valuable lessons when things often seem very complicated, very difficult, and we find ourself being hurt. The mother picks up the phone and calls you and says something that's disparaging to you. You have to, very quietly, say inside of yourself, sorry mom this is not my problem. You can turn to the mom and say: Thank you for your opinion, but I choose to disagree. And refuse to argue it any further. That makes people crazy when you won't argue their point of view. It makes them absolutely insane. This is one of the reasons Alfred, we say: Not my problem. Because no one has a place to go from that. Except they use these wonderful words: Oh, you're in denial. In denial of what? It's not your problem. It's their problem.

Alfred:

So regardless of your opinion of whether somebody is doing something mean or not, there's just some people that give off negative energy, negative vibration. Hans, what can people do when there's a person who's giving off negative energy? Is it that they would just do protection exercises?

Hans:

Yes, and we have those Alfred in our classes, in our on-line service. I think we might even have a free download on that. But yes, you can just go to your Guidance and say: I choose to surround myself in love and light. I choose not to allow this emotional tirade or this situation to affect me in any way. And I always say every day: Please bring light into that that would bring darkness around me today. Every single day I've said it for 50 years. Folks, you do the same and you'll see the wonders that come to be.

Alfred:

So in case anybody doesn't have Intuitive Development or doesn't know where that exercise is, one of the things that we try to teach you is to surround yourself...for some reason the typical type of light that comes to me is like a silverish grey and to either form a bubble around you or form a bubble in front of you and have that bubble have the intention to have that bubble absorb the negative energy. Believe it or not it works.

Hans:

It really does work.

Alfred:

Hans likes wrapping Saran Wrap around yourself.  

Hans:

You do the bubble.

Alfred:

I do the bubble. So that's one...

Hans:

So they have options, Alfred.

Alfred:

Yes.

Hans:

Saran Wrap or a bubble.

Alfred:

Or whatever type of "thing" you want to put around you, just simply work with the Other Side to have something deflect or absorb the negative energy so it doesn't reach you. Okay? And then, of course, sometimes the negative energy does reach you. I have a doctor friend of mine from Rhode Island who someone had an issue and it wound up getting into her body unknowingly. I did some Reiki on her. So for reason if you're around someone who had a physical problem, or you're around a mean person and you can tell that energy got into you, you can go to a Holistic practitioner, a Reiki practitioner, an Energy practitioner, an Acupuncturist, to help unblock the energy and remove that energy from your body. So there are a bunch of different things that you can do if something happened to come through to you. Okay? So here's a real good one, not just dealing with the energy but what should you do if someone does something that you perceive as mean to you? How's that one Hans?

Hans:

Aah. What can you do if someone's done something mean to you? Forgive them by saying something... I don't even mean forgive them. I would say if someone does something mean to you, go inside of yourself and say: This is not true. This is not my problem. I send them love. I send them light. But this does not affect me. I choose to use this as a teaching to reinforce the love and light that I am. And I know that sounds very crazy. Spirit has never been big on forgiveness. Because if your intention is to do something bad to somebody, that's one thing. But if somebody gets hurt by something you might have said or done but it was in no way your intention to hurt anybody, you don't need to be forgiven. Because the goodness of your heart will shine forward anyway. How often have we done something or said something that we felt later: Oh, my goodness that hurt. Oh, I shouldn't have said that. And we'll go back and correct it.

Alfred:

And a lot of forgiveness has the assumption that something was wrong. If you have the assumption that something was wrong, then you would say okay, I forgive them for that wrong or mean thing that they did. And that's what we're trying to tell you is if you have the perception that you know what, it's just something that somebody's going through and there is nothing wrong. If you don't have a judgment that they did anything wrong, they're just dealing with life, is there anything to forgive?

Hans:

Exactly...exactly.

Alfred:

Okay? So speaking of interesting people who approach you and are around your area is family.

Hans:

Aaaahhh...

Alfred:

How should you...

Hans:

The big hurt... (Laughing)

Alfred:

...perceive mean family members Hans? What do you...

Hans:

Oh boy...

Alfred:

How many clients do you have that ask you that question?

Hans:

Oh my God, thousands through the years. I keep going back to something... I'm trying to educate you all on this. You have to shift your perception and so I keep repeating myself today because this one perception applies to everything. When someone is being mean to you, when somebody is hurting you and your family, they're saying things about you, or saying things about other people, you cannot let that in children. And you do that by internally saying: Not my problem. Do not engage others in their idea of who you are. Do not engage others with their idea of who somebody else is. I have people who talk to me about someone that I'm very fond of and they'll say oh this person is this and this person is that and they did this and they did that - this is a really wonderful person by the way - but people are hurt by the lost expectations sometimes. And I'll always say: For me this is a wonderful person and I love this person and I have no judgment of this person and I'll say perhaps you need to look at why you have a judgment.

And with families, families will always try to take sides and bring certain members on to their team and there are other members on the other team and Alfred, you of all people know that with your family and other families, how they take sides and they see people with certain people and... Remember all that?

Alfred:

Oh my God, holidays... Holidays were, okay who is coming? And if this person isn't coming well the other people can't come because these people are coming. And for the people who are coming who can sit near who, who can't sit near who, who has to sit away from...

Hans:

Is that not just this side of insanity? This side of insanity?

Alfred:

It was. It was insanity.

Hans:

And to get caught up in that. That's why so many of you will say to me: Hansy, I don't want to go home for Thanksgiving. Then don't go home! It's okay. Know you don't need to forgive yourself for not going. You choose not to disturb, hear this children, you choose not to disturb you ease. And when you do, you will become dis-eased. Do not disturb your ease. I pre-recorded the Michael Beckwith Show yesterday and one of the things that we were talking about is the fact that the world as we live in it today is nothing more than an illusion. Now all of you have heard me say is there anything going on in your life you did not create. So we're walking through our creation, other people's creation, somebody else's creation, and it's all perception. There's no reality to it. Is the wind blowing from the east? Yes, end of subject. We don't need to know why it's blowing from the east. We do not know what it's supposed to do. It's blowing from the east. 

As spirits in human form we tend to take on the frailties of the human condition which is always analyzing everything and every single moment. So we go back. What's the biggest problem we will ever have? Our mind chatter. And as Alfred's been pointing out today - our perception. A little more on that please Alfred.

Alfred:

Well there's two ways to deal with mind chatter. So if you've been listening to Hans' teachings, the biggest focus is by letting go of mind chatter. In this topic what we're trying to do is to not have you get new mind chatter, not have you get new things to think about, not have you bring new negativity into your life. By simply understanding that mind chatter comes into your life because you have a perception or opinion about something, you have a judgment about something, and that judgment sticks with you and you have to do something because you have to protect yourself against what you had a judgment about and you have to make sure that that doesn't happen, and you have to protect and control what's going on around you - mind chatter. So one of the topic's main focus of this Mean People is if you don't have a judgment or an opinion about others actions, you don't start the mind chatter cycle. How's that Hans?

Hans:

I think that's absolutely perfect. It's the mind chatter that has the perception of  what somebody does and calls it mean. What we're saying to you is, when it happens, make it simple - bless them, release them, release the thought, don't allow it into your heart, don't think about it, not my problem, that's their problem, let them deal with it.

Alfred:

Especially, believe it or not, this applies to family members.

Hans:

Yes, absolutely. Folks I want to get this across. This is not anything that I want Alfred to talk about. I'm going to tell you: You are not responsible to make your family happy. You are not responsible to live up to their expectations of how you should be. You are not responsible for the pain, the sadness, and the losses of the individuals in your family. Your job is to love them equally, release them knowing that God will take care of them. You cannot fix your family. You understand me everyone? Set yourself free. Visit with them. I said to my mother, a very long time ago, I said if you cannot treat me with the same love and respect that I have for you, it's best we not talk until we can do that. And she said fine. And we never spoke again and that was 31 years long before she passed away. That had nothing to do with me. I was taking care of me. I did not care about what she was so enraged about which had nothing to do with me. I reminded her of somebody else. And she would blow all these things up and then I would become responsible for her pain. And it never had anything to do with me in the first place. I want everybody to hear that. No matter what has gone on in your family, I don't care what it is, back away from it and do not be responsible for that.

Alfred:

That really reminds of one of the teachings in the early part of Intuitive Development. We can actually expand this a little bit. The teaching was: What someone says...and we're going to expand this, or does... So what someone says or does is not your problem. What you think about what someone says or does is your problem. How's that one Hans?

Hans:

I think you're onto something there young man. I really do.

Alfred:

So the focus here and a lot of spirituality is not about what's going on outside of you. It's about becoming peaceful inside of you. Okay? Let me repeat that again: Spirituality in general, is not about what's going on outside of you. It's about creating a peaceful, loving place inside yourself. How's that Hans?

Hans:

Excellent, excellent, excellent. And that peaceful place that you find inside of yourself will resonate outside of you into many different forms. It will be seen by many different people. So that peaceful place that you find inside of yourself, as you grow it, it begins to emanate outward from you. And you'll find that people are less likely to attack you because they see it does them no good. That's when you win the battle of the lesson for you is when you're light is so bright that others cannot dispel it and they know it. And that's when we say: Not my problem. And Alfred, I think that will conclude the lessons for today. Thank you for your input.

Alfred:

Well I hope you all enjoyed that one. That is a “huge” topic. I was a very mad person for many, many, many years because of the mean people in my life.

Hans:

Oh gee, I never noticed... (Laughing)

Alfred:

No. Uh uh, do yourself a favor and save a lot of money – let go of mean people.