“Why Is It So Hard To Be Loved?” - by Hans Christian King Spiritual Radio Show Transcription

“Why Is It So Hard To Be Loved?” - by Hans Christian King 

Spiritual Radio Show Transcription

GUIDANCE FOR YOUR LIFE Radio Show

with Hans Christian King www.HansKing.com

and Alfred Ricci www.AlfredRicci.com

Topic: Why Is It So Hard To Be Loved?

August 9, 2014

Alfred:

Hello everyone and welcome to GUIDANCE FOR YOUR LIFE. This is Alfred, the Padawan to the Modern Day Mystic himself Hans Christian King. And we're coming to you live with a brand new topic for this show. Thank you very much for your patience over the last couple of weeks. We've been running around Mexico taking care of things. Now that things are taken care of, we're coming back at you. But before we get to our topic, which is "Why Is It So Hard To Be Loved?", first let's talk about some housekeeping. Of course we have on Facebook our "Random Acts of Kindness". It's not really a Contest, it's rewarding you for helping us help others. Basically, if you share any of Hans King's Quotes on Facebook we will randomly pick people to give Audio Lessons, Video Lessons and whatever prizes we just feel like giving out randomly. So please join Facebook if you haven't already - Hans Christian King1 - or  you can go to the front page of HansKing.com for our Facebook Page and “Share”. The more you “Share”, the more chances that we'll randomly pick you and just give out Free Stuff. And secondly we'll be posting a lot of Tele-seminar and Interview replays. Hans was recently on the John Burgos Show and I, myself was recently interviewed talking about Soul Mate Relationships. Those are going to be posted on Facebook when there's a replay. And Jennifer, can you you please tell everybody the dates of the replays are going to happen?

Jennifer:

I sure can Alfred. Hi everyone, it's great to be with you again. There's a lot going on this week.  I believe we have 4 Interviews that are happening. First up is the Interview Hans did on the Awakening Heart Network. That's replaying now through Monday, August 11th. This Interview is also on HansKing.com. If you look under "Free Recordings", you'll find it at the top of the page. On Wednesday, August 13th, Hans will appear on The Year of Miracles Tele-seminar. Also on Wednesday, August 13th, Alfred will be making an appearance on The Passion and Intimacy Tele-seminar. And on Thursday, August 14th, Hans' appearance with John Burgos on Beyond The Ordinary will be replayed. If you missed that one the first time, be sure and catch it this Thursday! Alfred, these will all be posted on Hans' Official Facebook Page so just in case I missed any, everyone please check back on Facebook for updates. Thanks and back to you Alfred.

Alfred:

Thanks Jennifer for letting us know when the replays are going to happen. And of course just randomly keep checking our Facebook Page to find out when we are going to be broadcasting Interviews. We do have 2 Facebook Pages. One of them is a "Follow" Facebook Page. We're no longer using that one. We're only using the "Like" Facebook Page. If you happen to wind up on the "Follow" Facebook Page. If you happen to wind up on the “Follow” Facebook Page it will say "We're No Longer Using This Page", please go to this particular Facebook Page. Because we're only making Announcements on One. So basically if you're at Hans King's Page and you have "Liked" Hans or you can "Like" us, that's the right place to be to get information about Announcements, Random Acts of Kindness, Interviews and all kinds of other kinds of fun stuff. And I think that's pretty much it for the Announcements, so without further ado, I'll present to you the Modern Day Mystic himself Hans Christian King.

Hans:

Boy, you were a bit wordy today. A lot of things to say. Hi everybody, welcome back. Yes, we've been running around getting a lot of stuff done and so happy to be back with you. Most people in my profession and people around the world take breaks in July and August and the first of September. We didn't mean to take this big of a break but we're glad to be back with you and hope everyone is having an absolute wonderful summer. It is hot, it is humid where we are with very little, if any rain which no one here seems to understand. Anyway, God is great and I'm sure it'll rain when it's supposed to. I had a call that I did the other day and on the call, a very nice woman out of New York said to me: Hansy, she said: Why is it so difficult to be loved? She said: I've never sort of allowed myself to be loved. And of course the answer comes back through the heart that says: Do I deserve to be loved? Why are they loving me more than I love myself? Or: Shouldn't my parents love me? Or: Shouldn't I be accepted unconditionally by my friends? Why is it so difficult to be loved? Dear people, at some point all of you had asked this question. Start with the "I am". "I am being loved." If you knew, each and every one of you, how much unconditional love you receive every single day, both in the waking hours and in the sleeping hours, you are surrounded by a pool of love, friends, helpers, people who are dedicated to your dharma. And so we like to say: You know, you couldn't be alone if you tried. You have so much love out there. You need to go to that mirror. Remember that mirror trick that I taught all of you some years ago? And I said: Go stand in front of the mirror and look in the eyes of the person looking back and you and say: I don't know who you are but I'm going to find out and when I do I'm going to take very good care of you and I love you very much. Try that. Try to first love yourself. Because the creation of you is singular. There is not another you anywhere in infinity. You are unique and you and your relationship with your god are unique. There isn't anyone God loves more than you - you're so unique. You have to find the uniqueness of yourself. You know you hear me say that everyday when I get up I go and look at a flower or lI ook at a tree or look at the clouds. And I am so full of love at that moment to just be able to be with the trees, with the flowers. Even if it's snowing, I'll say: Isn't this beautiful? Finding beauty in what you see, feel and touch and looking in the mirror and finding the beauty of your own soul... Allowing people to say: I love you. Allowing people to bring you a flower or someone to say: Thank you for helping me. I love you. I get, every single day of my life, I get emails that are signed this way: Thank you for all you do. I love you. Every day. And sometimes it's hard because in my profession you have a tendency not to be able to remember everybody that you see because we see so many people. But I think: Isn't it incredible that somebody took the time to say: Thank you, I love you. So I say to all of you: Thank you, I love you. Your mind chatter develops a program and I call it "conditionality". And it can prove to you why you're not good enough to be loved. How's that working for you Alfred? 

Alfred:

It really is true that if you're looking for love to first love yourself. It is an unbelievably difficult task because normally the humanness of us wants to feel better by getting something. If you want to feel love, then you look for someone to give you love, you look for love by getting love. And what we're trying to tell you is: If you're looking for love, first go within. To love yourself. To be who you truly are. Of course do all the work that we've been talking about year after year. Do the inner work. But what we're talking about here specifically is: Love yourself. Trust your soul. Love your soul. Love who you truly are. Be that vibration of love. Know that you truly love yourself. Then when you go out looking for a soul mate partner that person will be attracted to the vibration of love that you are. If you haven't done this work, the inner work of loving yourself, imagine the vibration that you're giving off. Imagine the vibration that other people are picking up. Imagine the people that are being attracted to that vibration. So if you really want someone to love you truly, first start with truly loving yourself.

Hans:

I was talking with a friend today and during the conversation the friend was saying that their partner had gotten upset with them about something that hadn't been done and was hollering and screaming and being upset and they decided to use the old thing that we've taught them to do - which is at the moment, just love that person. Just go through, find the love inside your heart and love that person. And they said very shortly the whole thing was dissipated. Remember when I say to you: *You can't shine the light in the dark. The light will always  persevere...always. Learning to go to yourself every morning and say: I deserve to be loved today. First by myself, to be loved by who I am, even if I may not  know who I am, I am my best friend. No one will ever love me more than I do. Now let's stop right there. Think about what I said: No one will ever love you more than you should love yourself. And if that is happening to you, you are failing at the very game of life. You want someone who can see in you what you see in you and that's what when we call “someone being able to see you". To see that essence of that little angel in you. To fall in love with the person behind the eyes. That's why I have you go to the mirror and look in the mirror and talk to yourself, remind yourself you are your best friend. Remind yourself how much love that you have for you. Discover the wonder of "you". And when you do that it's like a magnet for other people and other situations. Pretty soon you begin to get things from others that say: Thank you for reminding me that I love you. And all people start to say little things to you and kindnesses start to come to you because people can feel that you have a kind heart, your essence is kind, your essence is love. Alfred says something that's key. If you're looking outside to be loved, you're failing at the game. That love comes when you identify the love that you have for you. It doesn't matter what others think of you. It doesn't matter what others say about you But it surely matters how you feel about you. And once you fully get that, once you fully understand that, your whole life will take on an entirely new direction. It's like accepting abundance for instance. You can't search for abundance, you won't find it. You have to become abundance. And when you become abundance, abundance becomes you. If you seek after love after love, you won't find it. But if you love you, it will find you. Remember your grandmother used to say to you: Never go looking for love. It finds you. Always. And the greatest gift you will ever give yourself is the wonder of your own human spirit. The love that God has for you. The love that Spirit sees in you. When I'm doing an appointment with somebody, I look past what I see, and all I can see is the little child inside of the person standing or sitting in front of me or on the phone or doing a Skype with me. I don't see who they're displaying. I see the essence of the Godforce in their heart. So that when Spirit looks at us, They have unconditional love. We teach you this year after year. Spirit looks at us, They have unconditional love. They don't see any flaw. Only we see a flaw in ourselves. Okay? Alfred?

Alfred:

And that's a lot to do with the inner work is when we stop being hard on ourself, when we stop picking on ourself, when we let go of our traumas, when we let go of those things that are haunting us, when we stop beating ourselves up and move over to "self love", "self unconditional love", just letting those things go which have haunted us for so many years... The true you, the essence of you, the soul of you, the Spirit in you will come out, will shine. You're uncovering that which you are. By doing the work, by letting "out" the loving soul, the loving being that you are and you let that shine, then all of a sudden the people that you wanted to attract to you will be without you having to look for them because then they can finally see who you truly are and be attracted to you.

Hans:

Thank you Alfred. Thank you. Sometimes we come from families that don't necessarily reinforce their love for us, or who may, for whatever reason, not have been loved when they were a child and find it difficult to love themselves, therefore love you. But if we operate ourselves out of a place of total love for all of them, realizing that everyone we meet is a product of the environment they were raised in. That they had set the agenda. They chose the parents for whatever agenda, whatever lessons they needed to learn. And we just see them as unconditional love. Even if they yell at us...no matter what happens. Of course friends, there are always going to be people who are not emotionally sound, or mentally well, who do great damage. And it's very hard to love those people. But if you operate to them without judgment and just send love - that's it - just love. We pulled down the Iron Wall across Europe. We pulled down that horrible wall in Berlin. We got rid of cruise missiles without firing a shot because it was the "right thing to do at the right time and love prevailed"...not armaments...love prevailed. So if you're feeling unloved, it comes from a very weak place in your own heart. The moment that starts to happen, the moment you start to feel alone, stop for a moment and say: Wait a minute. I'm my best friend. What am I talking about? I'm all I need. I am enough for me. And that's why I did the CD Series "You Are Enough". To help you to understand that all you need to do is see in you what God and Spirit see in you. That's it. Not what you're doing, not what you're wearing, but just looking in that mirror and knowing at that moment: Oh, my goodness I AM my best friend. And I love me and I know that my god sees in me all of my possibilities, all my potentials. No matter what your age, no matter what your profession. I have a thing that is concerning me an enormous amount. For those of you who are yelling, you'll probably raise your eyes, but we will see who is right in the end.  If we do not get cellphones out of our children's hands and our young people's hands, they are never going to experience true love and a life. It is not going to happen. I know people who can't get in a car without watching their cellphone. I watch people who can't eat meals in restaurants, who can't go to movies, who cannot do anything where they shut off their cellphone. Nothing. I watched a young man here in Mexico the other day during an entire movie he never brought his eyes up from his little smart-phone of some kind - never. He never saw the movie. I see people on buses, I see people in department stores, walking the streets, with their eyes glued and what is happening is they are becoming this new electronic age that impersonalizes all of us. I saw a very, very nicely dressed man and a woman, in the 50's the other day at a restaurant in Asheville in North Carolina. They came in, they sat down, they brought the menus over, they picked up their smart-phones. The waiter came back 3 times and finally they ordered. They looked at their cellphones or whatever, smart-phones. They looked at them during their entire meal. They never spoke a word to each other. That's concerning me. And if you find yourself doing that - you're running away from who you are. It's an escape mechanism. Love yourself enough please to not do that. Alfred's is currently raising his eyes over here because he knows how I feel about this. Alfred, what do you think about this?

Alfred:

It's a really tough one and I've boiled it down to "how much time do you take for yourself" verses "how much time do you take for others". Spiritually speaking it really doesn't sound like the best thing, but you really first need to take time for "you". One of the exercises that we go over in Intuitive Development and even when I teach Automatic Writing and Advanced Channeling, is you have to let go of everything in order to get in touch in the vibration of nature, in order to get in touch with the vibration of who you truly are - the vibration of Spirit. Being on these electronic devices - I can pretty much guarantee you that's pretty much not the vibration that's going through your body. Okay? If you're looking for love, if you're looking for self-love, you have to make sure you take time for you to vibrate as you, to vibrate as a soul, to vibrate as love and as I have found out and many people in my situation who are in IT or anybody who just has a smart-phone, that's not the vibration of those little gadgets, that's not the vibration of working with technology. So just try to carve out "you" time. Time to go feed the ducks, time to walk in nature, time to go look at flowers. You're talking to somebody who could not understand flowers 2 years ago, could not understand nature a few years ago. And if it wasn't for the Great Mystic himself, I probably wouldn't...

Hans:

The Great Poobah to you.

Alfred:

Yes, the Poobah. Is that your new name Hans? The Poobah?

Hans:

I had that a couple of years ago.

Alfred:

The Grand Poobah.

Hans:

The Great Grand Poobah, yes.

Alfred:

So talking from someone who's experienced life in the extreme of technology... Yes, it's great it'll help promote your career. Yes, it's great to keep in touch with people. But you are in control and that is not spiritual. Spiritual is letting go. Spiritual is about connecting to the vibration of Spirit. And that's what we're trying to say here is if you're trying to find love in your life, first let go of all of those things, surrender all of those things, stop looking outward and look inward and connect to the vibration of love “within you” first.

Hans:

Thank you Alfred. I said to a friend of mine this morning: What would happen to you and I took this cellphone, this smart-phone, away from you right now and turned it off? And you could see in his face absolute concern. Because this person's on vacation, alright? And I said: And I turned it off for 3 hours. And he said: Well what if somebody wants to get in touch with me and what if this... I said: That's not the issue.  I asked you what you would do if I took this away for 3 hours. And so that person had no place in the person they've become for that reality. No place to go to the beach without taking the cellphone...I guess it's called a smart-phone. No place to do anything in their life without it. Date applications, Taxi applications, Grocery applications... And what I'm going to say to all of you and I want you to all remember this: Operating on the smart-phones is opposite of being a spiritual being, period. Period. First comes “the you” and what you give and do for “you”. That's what Alfred was talking about. Then what you do is another matter entirely. How you operate the rest of your life is completely different. But if you're unable to shut off your smart-hone, if you're unable to back away from you computer, if you find yourself taking your smart-phone to dinner, operating it in the car, then children you are losing the essence of your own spiritual development. That is not loving yourself. That's hiding from yourself. So for all of you who want to practice spiritual development, do so in a way that you provide a peaceful, loving space to love yourself. And I watched Alfred struggle with this. To this day I watch him struggle with taking the cellphone to a restaurant...the smart-phone. There is something being built into our children that said it is the appendage of you. No it's not. It's a device manufactured by people to control the minds of people. I realize I'm getting old but eventually people will see this. Alrighty Alfred, I think that concludes the lesson for today.